What if your job is not your passion?
Maybe it’s something you recognize. You feel that the work you do is not something you want to do forever, you do not really get energy from it and you are not eager to start work in the morning. Fortunately, this is very normal and not a bad thing at all! Unfortunately, you can’t snap your fingers and suddenly live your dream life. If only it were so ;-). There are countless intermediate stages and you also have to deal with certain life circumstances. For example, you have a partner you want to take into account, you have a nice contract at work with good working conditions, you have nice colleagues you don’t want to say goodbye to, you have a house/children/pet that make you not want to take the risk to make changes. All very good reasons to have a job that doesn’t make you soulfully happy but makes you live a nice life in the practical way.
Should everyone chase their dream life?
All around you, you there a signs that people are living their dream life. Social media is bursting with people who are successful, happy and have clearly found their passion. Something to pursue, right? If you’re not there yet, it can often feel like you’re failing. In another blog post about finding your passion I talk about how you shouldn’t seek a passion, you should design your life so that every step you take is a helpful step. If you keep taking steps in the, at that moment, right direction, you will automatically reach the point where you do get that feeling that a passion can give you. That gut feeling. That feeling that lets you know it’s right. But if you stay where you are now, you’re never going to find that feeling or passion.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s totally fine if you take a step back, be okay with the way things are right now. Or if you choose that it’s just fine the way it is and you don’t want to look for a passion at all. Not to mention, there are also people who choose to put their family, their hobby or something else first and thus do not find it important to find their passion in their work. For them, it is more important to have the financial security to do what they have chosen to do (which might just be their passion). All totally fine!
But what steps do you take to find that passion? Let’s talk about it.
Small steps towards your dream life
To start discovering/living your dream life, you have to take steps and keep moving. It doesn’t have to happen all at once, you are not going to find that passion within a predetermined time. Keep taking steps and you will get there.
For example, you can start with a vision board. I devoted an entire blog post to this. In short, creating a vision board ensures that you bring focus to your life. You know that thing when you’ve bought a new and shiny bag, and a day later you suddenly see lots of people walking around with it? That’s how the law of attraction works. By consciously applying focus, you start seeing things you didn’t see before, you start talking to people you otherwise wouldn’t have talked to, and you take actions that otherwise wouldn’t have occurred to you. When you start bringing out this vision, your goals, things move even faster! That way, you are going to “attract” people who could possibly help you achieve your goals.
In a vision board, you are going to put together images that depict what sparks joy, what you want your life to look like in the future. Do you want to speak in front of groups? Then find a picture that brings out that feeling in you. Do you want a beautiful house in nature? Ditto. Would you like to have a large family? Find an image that feels right for you. By just looking at those pictures every day, you imprint an image in your mind that gets your brain used to that new idea and create focus.
Affirmations are phrases you say to yourself – out loud, in your head or on paper. Those phrases are going to cause you to get into a more focussed mindset and create new thought patterns. Is it your dream to someday give a TED talk about your expertise but at the moment find it super scary to be in front of an audience? Then you can say the following sentence to yourself every morning, “I enjoy speaking in front of large groups of people. I always speak with confidence because I know what I’m talking about”. In this way, you will begin to transform thought patterns that are currently holding you back from living your dream life. You can do this for any negative thoughts you have. In your affirmation, always speak as if it is already so. If you say “I want to feel good in front of large groups of people,” you keep telling your brain that you want it, it always remains something that is in the future. This might be a big step but know you could start small; “I love to eat a healthy breakfast so I can feel energized before I start my day”. Anything you can think of.
Invest free time
You can start investing time in addition to your normal working hours to live your dream life. For example, if you already know what you want, you can devote a few hours a week to these activities. Don’t know what you want yet? Then you can invest in your future by attending a master class, retreat or talk to a coach to discover what you really want. Figure out how much time you want to give yourself and figure out if it’s possible to scale your paying job down and chasing your passion up.
Scanning job openings
Looking at job openings doesn’t necessarily mean you’re looking for another job right away. You can just research without any real goal to -find- a new job. That may sound a little derogatory, because sure you can, you know that yourself! But have you ever looked at job openings without that oppressive feeling? Without guilt toward your current employer or yourself? Go browse just for fun and keep in the back of your mind that you are not looking to apply, but just to see if something appeals to you, if there is something you might want to do in the future. And hey, start looking at jobs that are completely outside your knowledge level! Who knows, you might discover some really cool stuff. The great thing is, you can then start incorporating those when exercising the other tips I mention in this blog post.
Go to a networking event or see if you can network online. Can’t? See if you can find people you find inspiring through a social media platform. Instead of looking at the content someone shares, look at what type of person they are. Does that person appeal to you? Do you feel a click? Start a conversation, talk about what your shared interests are, ask questions! That person might then connect you with other people as well. The more fun people you gather around you, the more likely your future will be more fun, too.
Say goodbye to people who are a negative influence
I myself am not a fan of keeping people around me who are a negative influence in my life. I break contact when it no longer feels like we could add value to each others lives. In order to start living a dream life, sometimes you have to detach yourself from the people in your life who keep you small and keep you from taking the steps you really want to take. If these people happen to be in your family, maybe take a look at the book “Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents”, chances are you’ll learn something about yourself and your family and you will finally be able to detach from your family’s negativity (don’t worry, you don’t need to break off contact with them to be able to achieve this).
Go discover what your qualities are and what you like
If you know what your qualities are and what you like, you can start giving more direction to your life. Most of us let circumstances guide our lives and go along with what is expected for a bit. Sometimes this is good, sometimes not. By that I mean; you let other people and the things happening around you shape and determine your life. Doing what is “expected.”
Do you find it difficult to even start with the advice I’ve given in this article? You can always ask for help. You yourself often have blind spots, are too modest or do not dare to see your qualities as good qualities. It is useful to ask help because other people can look at you objectively without benefiting from your changes. Keep in mind that if you ask people you know you’ll get answers you expect. Asking a more objective person like a coach or psychologist might be better able to help you in these circumstances.
Don’t be overwhelmed by all the advice I’ve given. Just pick one and focus on that one for a while. You can do it! I know you can!